El mundo es un panuelo

Long time, huh?


I went to Hard Rock Cafe Bangkok today, primarily because Jean, a fellow Zamboangeno who just recently arrived in Same-Same Land, told me that another fellow Zamboangeno- who is the son of my former college instructor in Ateneo- is in the band playing the keyboard.

When I got there, I found out it wasn't just him- it was the majority of the band! And they were freaking awesome. When the female vocalist went on stage, I thought that I recognized her. When she saw me in the audience and did a double-take herself, I knew she was this former schoolmate of mine from high school, Sharon. She recognized me as well and waved. "There's a Zamboangeno in the house! A Claretian!" she called out and pointed in my direction. Everyone turned to me and Jean. What the hell is a Zamboangeno, or a Claretian, the Thais must have thought. Na, kanatun.

The male lead vocal on the other hand was a true-blue rocker from WMSU. Really brought down the house. When he found out that me and Jean were from Zamboanga, he began injecting some Chavacano in his songs. "De Baliwasan yo..." he chanted in the middle of a rock song. Hehe.

When the bar closed all of us lingered and chatted and shared some good ol' Chavacano laughs. 
It really is a small world.


___________________
* The band is playing throughout May. Catch them. 

Welcome to Boa

Except for the Filipino couple at the eighth floor I don't know any other living soul in my apartment.

Now you have to realize this is very different from where I come from. Back in my 'hood in Zamboanga City, everybody knew each other.

Welcome to Boa, San Jose road. Population, approximately 500. Let me walk you through my childhood neighborhood.

Right in front of our house lived an old grandmother and her grandchildren, Day-Day and Night-Night. I never found out what their real names were. I remember my siblings and I ganging up on Night-Night one day because she told us that she liked our dad and asked us if he could be her dad as well. She never had a father figure as she and her sister were born out of wedlock. My siblings and I were childish and stupid and should never have told Night-Night we would kill her if she stole our father from us. From the bottom of my heart, I'm sorry, Night-Night.

A few yards away from our house lived the Husseins. They are a Muslim bunch with a wicked sense of humor- they named one of their kids Saddam, so this kid's full name is Saddam Hussein. All of the Hussein kids are nurses. Right next to the Husseins is another Muslim family that always played mahjong. Once they caused a big fuss when they caught a thief in their house. They beat the guy up, and then tied him to a tree for a few hours before calling the cops. Poor thief was stripped naked. In that same house lived Neng. Neng had a retarded son, Jordan, whom she gave up when he was born. She gave him up to her own mother, Nida, who lived just a few blocks away. Nida raised Jordan as her own.

The children's playground in Boa is at the Laygan's compound. It's a large open space where we would ride our bikes around, play tag and hold our little gang meetings. Two of the Laygan kids are Chet and Clark. Chet liked Mimie of the Hussein family. One time, to express his affection for Mimie, Chet told Mimie to hold out her palm, and then he spit on it.

The most famous person in our neighborhood would be Zeny, a well-respected lady who worked as a radio announcer. She was very articulate in Chavacano, and also very active in the church. She and some other devout Catholics would usually hold some Bible-sharing activities in the neighborhood. One day it was held in our house and my siblings and I were taken aback when Zeny started speaking in tongues.

We had a gay neighbor named Pendong. Pendong had a live-in boyfriend named Ricky. One day the entire neighborhood woke up to the loud moans of Pendong. There was a huge commotion because Pendong had slashed his wrists. Apparently Ricky left him for Annie, who incidentally, lived right next to them. Ricky and Annie eventually got married. Annie is one of the ten children of Betty. I went to elementary and high school with another one of Betty's kids, Globy. I had actually blogged about Betty before, if you remember. She was the one who would come to our house to chat with my aunt Leonor. On one occasion, Betty narrated how she was lured and uhm, "abused" by some guy in Palau when she went there for a vacation. Betty's husband worked in Palau as a carpenter.

Pendong's brother is Kindal, a feared drug addict and alcholic. He was always nuts and would sometimes threaten my oldest aunt when he was high. When he was not under the influence however, he would plead with my aunt for leftover food.

A short distance away lived Fran and her husband Ramon who worked as a career soldier in the army. While Fran's husband was from the Armed Forces of the Philippines, her brother on the other hand was a member of the communist group New People's Army. But that was never a problem. There's peace and brotherly love in our quaint little neighborhood.

***


When I was 12 we moved out of Boa to a small village in San Roque road. It's a boring neighborhood, save for that one time when we found a dead woman's body thrown into the bushes.

The Christmas Diaries

Sept 08, 2006
113 days before Christmas

Hi Tony, I am seeking your early permission to allow me to take a vacation leave for six days (Dec. 20 - 22 and 27 – 29). I’ll be going home to Zamboanga City to be with my family for Christmas. Unlike Manila-based employees, I don’t really have the liberty of seeing them anytime I want as they live miles away, so I am hopeful that this request be approved. Pardon this early request, I will be purchasing my plane ticket as early as possible to secure my flight back as scheduled— seats are very difficult and costly to secure during the holidays.

Early Christmas cheers,
Jesse

Okay, so maybe I was little too excited asking for the leave as early as September but hey, that’s how you get things done in the corporate world.

The VL's I took were just for 6 days, but considering the non-working holidays and all, I would actually be out of Manila on Dec. 20 and back on January 2. So excited!




Dec. 15, 2006
10 days before Christmas

Newsflash: Dory strikes again!

The phone that I’ve grown accustomed to has decided to be with all my other phones in heaven. He shall be missed sorely. I lost all my contacts and would be tempted to text people with “Who you?” in the days to come. (Achtung to all my pals, please text me your phone numbers!)

My officemates at Shell and I had our Christmas party on a Friday night and it was held in a bar in Malate. The place was called Abbas something. It was a fun party, there were lotsa games all of which I joined enthusiastically (buwaya, yeah), including this one where I had to plant my lipstick-laden lips on a black and white picture of the face of our new manager, Ted.

The things I do to win imported chocolates.

As we are in the Philippines, no party is complete without of course exchanging presents. I’m not at all against this Christmas tradition, but what I really don’t like is how pretentious the tradition has become, especially here in Manila. Back in good ol’ Zambo Jambo City, people would have a Kris Kringle (Secret Santa) without people asking to receive something in particular. That’s the fun part of it, actually, to try to determine what to give with the hope the recipient would like the present. Here in Manila, it’s a lot different based on the past three Christmases that I’ve… endured. Here, people would actually draw up an elaborate wish list, with first, second and last choices to boot. What the fuck is wrong with these people? Isn’t that like… begging? And what would be the difference if they just bought the goddamn thing when they actually expect to receive it? It’s so pretentious, you can’t call that gift-giving. Wish lists are generally fine, but I think they shouldn’t be used in exchanging of gifts. It becomes self-defeating then.

To prove my point, in the wish list I wished for a plasma ball.


Good luck on finding that one.

My Secret Santa left me a note saying she didn’t know what the thing was and insisted that I provide an alternative. Hmm, the “second choice.” I thought for a moment and in an effort to make her life a little easier, I replied with “any book by Christopher Moore.” At least I didn’t specify any title, that would be my only surprise left. Moore’s books are a little expensive, I was hoping she’d still go look for the plasma ball all over the city.

The one who picked my name turned out to be Aileen, this sweet rotund lady from Projects team. She gave me a Moore book all right, only she got it all wrong, instead of Christopher Moore she picked a book by Michael Moore. Yes, the Super-size Me Michael Moore.

Holy elf.




Dec. 16, 2006
9 days before Christmas

Because the times are difficult (and primarily because I can’t trust myself with an expensive phone anymore), I decided to get a Nokia 6060 as a replacement. At least that’s one thing scratched from my wish list – I now have a cool flip phone! I hurriedly downloaded the Counter Terrorist Unit logo from the TV series 24 as my wallpaper and the intercom ring as my ring tone. Now I’m a full-pledged CTU agent!

I love this phone, and it’s actually cheap – just around four grand for brand new! I got it for that price because I bought it from a wholesaler whom I met on the internet. (Leave a note for his number.) This phone already has a 64K color LCD, can download themes, can play mp3 ringtones and browse the net. It also has an Expense Manager application to help me monitor my expenses. It’s like the Nokia 6230i but without the bluetooth, camera and video player and with much less memory. But who needs these things, I already have digicam. And the flip phone feature sealed the deal.

Because of this unexpected expenditure, plus my feat to slash my credit card bills to 80%, my holidays will probably be drier than San Miguel Super Dry…




Dec. 17, 2006
8 days before Christmas

What: Company Christmas Party
Where: Westin Philippine Plaza
When: 7 pm
Attire: 70’s glitter

I went, of course, in my plain t-shirt, jeans and sneakers.

Look how all the girls flocked to me.







Dec. 18, 2006
7 days before Christmas

Heidee and I dropped by KPMG – my former employer – to have Christmas lunch at Green Tomato with Miles, one-half of our last remaining friends in the firm. The other half is Edwin, who’s now a Partner there and one of the best managers I’ve ever known. He couldn’t make it to the lunch because it was impromptu and he had made a prior engagement. I got him and Miles square umbrellas with the Shell logo as presents. Corporate marketing, yeah. Edwin emailed me later that he got me something as well (yahoo!), but I couldn’t drop by again to pick it up until after New Year’s Day as I’d be heading to Zamboanga for the holidays.

I said that Miles and Edwin are our last remaining friends in KPMG because except for one, all others have already gone abroad for greener pastures. Febryan, my incessant In-Charge, has recently flown to London to work in E&Y. Reylyn, the newly wed, moved to Cayman Islands. Natalie migrated to Australia and now works in the local KPMG office down under. Donna had left KPMG for Kraft Philippines.

What am I still doing here?




Dec. 19, 2006
6 days before Christmas

A FedEx package for me arrived in the office today. It’s from my good friend Jenilee who’s now living in Brooklyn, New York. I knew exactly what was inside the pack because I invited her to check out my blog (specifically the part about my wishlist, hehe). And she actually got me Holidays on Ice by David Sedaris all the way from NYC! And it’s hard bound, not any of those cheap paperbacks. Thank you thank you thank you Fartner!



After work, I headed back home where more exchanging of gifts took place. I had picked Ronald’s name and got him some Bench underclothing. He is one to like something very practical. Coincidentally, Ronald had also picked my name and got me a Starbucks coffee press! A coffee press! I was euphoric! In a recent trip to Starbucks with Nald I actually mentioned to him that I wanted to have a coffee press because an auto-drip coffee maker was difficult to maintain but I had the faintest idea he was the one who picked me for our Kris Kringle.



The stars have lined that day.




Dec. 20, 2006
5 days before Christmas

I am finally back home in Zamboanga City!




No work, no worries!

That is, until people from work would text me and say Houston, we have a problem.

But for now, I will relax.

And sleep.

And greet my sister Jeannette a happy birthday. She’s in Saudi Arabia experimenting on Arabs as a nurse.

If all my plans will push through, I will be in Sta. Cruz Island after Christmas, and in Dakak before New Year’s Day. And fly back to Makati on January the second.

Sta. Cruz, by the way, is the only island in the country that’s got pink sand on the beach. Yes, pink. Because it’s uninhibited and not frequented by tourists, the place is clean and the waters are crystal clear. Can’t fucking wait.





Dec. 21, 2006
4 days before Christmas

Brought Divine to the pueblo. I had missed my li’l sis! She’s got really long hair now.

I learned that Divine has thrown aside her CD’s of Hale, Orange and Lemons, et al in favor of — guess who — Willie Revillame.

Boom Tarat Tarat is Number 1 in the Siason’s Residence Top of the Charts. Such a profound song, this one. It heralds the coming of the Season, and Willie Revillame invites everyone to bring the trumpets out and do a semi-Macarena dance.

Boom tarat tarat
Boom tarat tarat
Tararat tararat
Boom boom boom!

Somebody build Willie a shrine, quick.




Divine knows the steps to the song and I was pressured to learn them as well so I won’t appear too out of place. Pull elbows in, place left hand on left butt, right hand on the right butt. Repeat. Sway hands to the left, sway hands to the right, thrust pelvis forward three times. Boom boom boom.

I also discovered Divine’s new ‘thing’. She rips off the covers of any book she finds and makes a fan out of the cardboard. My mom asked me to buy her any fan and I did but it lasted just a few hours with her before it ended up in the rubbish bin.

“What’s with the cardboard?” I ask Divine.

“No hay lang. Paypay. (Nothing much. Fan.),” she replies nonchalantly.

I think I should get her a really large empty box for Christmas so she can create as many cardboard fans as she can to her delight.




Dec. 24, 2006
1 day before Christmas

I had dinner with my high school pals and ended up in the disco.


(the ladies...)


(Cheen and Janet)

As the night wore off I lost my voice from needing to shout over the loud music. Now I can’t do my Beegees impression anymore.




Dec. 25, 2006

To everyone reading this, to families and friends, to enemies and competition, to anyone who ended up in this blog while googling "boracay sex manila,”

Merry Christmas!!!



Following is the official list of friends who texted me good tidings. Look for your name:

1. Jemely
2. Rodel
3. Heidee
4. Janet
5. Cheen
6. Sherrydan
7. Tanya
8. Claire
9. Sheryll
10. Maya
11. Sheila
12. Cate
13. Kathy
14. Chris
15. Flisha
16. Edwin
17. Gay
18. Jason
19. Tating
20. Jennifer
21. Rona
22. Perla
23. Miles
24. Zenie
25. Aimee
26. Ian
27. Jon
28. Toto
29. Francis

If you think we are friends and you’re not in the list, I require a one paged apology letter for forgetting to greet me, else I will erase you from my memory and my Friendster. That will be the end of you.

Speaking of friends, yesterday I received a message in my Friendster from a guy named Mark. He wrote:

Puede kita queda amigo? Triste gayot yo aqui na Manila. Mio parientes todo talya na Zamboanga. (Can we be friends? I’m very lonely here in Manila. All my relatives are in Zamboanga.)

I think this Mark character is a serial killer.





Dec. 26, 2006
Day after Christmas

Finally had satti!

Satti is this Southern delicacy that I missed in Manila —the Big City doesn’t have it. It’s this red spicy broth with three sticks of beef barbecue and chops of compressed rice. It doesn’t really taste that good but because I couldn’t find it in Manila, I sort of convinced myself that I just gotta have it. And I did. Now I need to get my hands on marang, this exotic fruit that sells for 10 to 20 pesos in Zamboanga but comes at a steep 250 pesos in Manila.

Today I went on a joyride around the city with some friends. Short lived though, because my runny nose wouldn’t cooperate and the air was too humid I was feeling sticky all over. Since when has Zamboanga been hotter than Manila?

We were supposed to go to Aplaya Bonita (literally, Beautiful Ocean) located far in the outskirt of the city in Barangay Patalon but half way to the beach, I realized it was too dark already to think about going there so instead we settled on this beach in Barangay Maasin and took pictures of the sunset at the boulevard.





(At the quadrangle of the new Ateneo High School building in Divisoria, ZC)

***

Have you watched “The Family Stone?” I watched it for the first time tonight on DVD. Somebody said it was a tearjerker— probably why I didn’t have he interest to watch it when it came out— but after watching the movie, it being tearjerker is an exaggeration. My tears come cheap man, I mean, I wailed at the Maricel Soriano-starrer “Mila,” but Family Stone didn’t have as much power. It does come nice and recommendable, however only for Christmas season. We can stomach a lot of things during the holidays. Even Sarah Jesssica Parker.





December 27, 2006
5 days before the New Year

Heidee sent me a text message telling me we could still go to Aplaya Bonita after all. I hurriedly got up, wiped the drool off my face and took a quick bath. I was ready.

Apparently we were going with our former classmate Rona and a backpacker, Eric. Eric's an American from Hawaii, although he did mention he was not American by breed and he was going about the city discovering the people, the food and the culture. Seeing that I may be under someone’s travel log as a native, I had a silent urge to perform a cultural presentation for this foreigner, and biting the head off a chicken while dancing– like what some people do in talent contests– was the first thing on my mind. Followed by a Boom Tarat Tarat dance number.

Eric was backpacking through Asia and the Philippines was first leg of his journey. He’d been to several cities and provinces in the country before this trip to Zamboanga (actually, he’s been to more places in the country in two months than I’ve been in my entire life), and he was headed to Sindangan, Malaysia right the next day. I asked him how much he’s spent for his Philippine stint and he shared he had spent around two thousand dollars (roughly one hundred thousand pesos). It’s kind of unfair because you can’t backpack through the United States or UK for two months with just that amount. Silly third world boy me.

When we reached Aplaya Bonita, I was disappointed. I couldn’t find the “bonita” in Aplaya Bonita. Maybe it was meant as a joke. Eric’s spirit, however, wasn’t dampened a bit, he was saying, “It’s still pretty” and “Once you get in the water, it’s really all just the same.” For someone who was used to really fantastic beaches in Hawaii, he was being too optimistic I wanted to cry. Here was a foreigner telling me to love my own beach. Shame on me! Shame on me! I love my country! There is “bonita” in Aplaya Bonita!

After a quick lunch on the beach of the wonderful, magnificent and picturesque Aplaya Bonita, we headed to the east coast of the city to check out this new resort called Woodland in barangay Zambowood. It’s a neat place, although the pool was quite crowded and reeking too much of chlorine. It was refreshing to see a lot of greenery in the resort though.



Since it was his last day in the Philippines, Eric decided to treat us to dinner at a famous seafood restaurant in the city, Hai San. We had steamed Lapu-lapu, Fish Sinigang, Spicy Squid, Agar Salad and an exotic steamed Sea Mantis in Soy Sauce. I took a video of the weird sea mantis (mantises? mantae?) before the chef butchered them.





December 28, 2006
4 days before the New Year

Had coffee with my former classmates in college today. I finally saw Lynette, my perennial seatmate way back in the day. A lot of them are taking up Law because they’re bored with their work. Rodel is wearing braces now. Strict na pala parents nya, hehe. Nice seeing you again guys!

Today we were supposed to go the pink sand beach of Sta. Cruz Island but because a lot of people backed out, the plan was scrapped.

I hope the people responsible can’t sleep tonight. I hope they get indigestion or something.





December 29, 2006
3 days before the New Year

Woke up early because Jeffrey, Ruth, Heidee and I were going to Dakak Resort in Dapitan!

We stayed for just one night in the resort and spent a grand total of two and a half freaking hours on the beach compared to the 16 hours bus travel to and from Dakak. These are the moments when you appreciate your friends better – they keep you sane when things go crazy.






Our only regret is that we had to leave right away to make it to New Year’s Eve in Zamboanga City. Heidee's additional regret is losing her cellphone.

Dakak is very nice, very green and very quiet. There weren’t a lot of people around although it was considered to be peak season. Such a shame we didn’t get to spend much time as planned on the resort.


(Jeff and I whalloping away!)





December 31, 2006
Day before the New Year

I had lunch with the inseparable couple (and my good friends) Flisha and Gimbo today.



I gave Flisha a stuffed bear as a present and Gimbo a Shell mug. Flisha later sent me a text message saying, “Did you know the bear was holding a pink bone in its pocket? I don’t know, it’s kind of naughty!”

It’s Gimbo’s bone-r actually, I replied.

She didn’t text back.

***

I dropped by the Coca-Cola office to meet Kathy.









January 1, 2007

First post of the year! Happy New Year everyone!!!

I brought my sister Divine to Mindpro Citimall to catch Happy Feet before heading to the Metropolitan Cathedral to meet my parents for the New Year’s Day mass. I had already watched the movie in Makati but because Divine wanted to see them penguins, I sat through the entire movie anyway.

I initially liked Happy Feet, especially that part where one of the smaller penguins couldn’t jump off the cliff to join his friends he had to fool himself he slipped, but towards the end of the movie when the humans made an appearance, I was squirming in my seat. The humans had no place in that movie, they ruined it.




***

I made a special request from my mom to cook us curacha for New Year's Day. Unbeknownst to most Manilenos who think curacha is nothing but a Rosanna Roces bold flick, curacha is actually a Zamboanga delicacy, a crustacean cooked in the sinfully delicious Alavar sauce. The sauce is so tasteful you'd want to smother your face in it. Really. And the crustacean tastes a lot like crab but looks quite different.



***


Here’s to a prosperous new year!

Back to the Debate World

I used to do a lot of debating. Competitive debating. As in the whole "spirit of the motion" and "you failed to address the real issue" thing.

It started when I was in sophomore college in Ateneo de Zamboanga University. They needed some fresh blood to participate in the Ateneo Fiesta Debates, and my Accounting 203 teacher John Itoh, himself one of the best debaters in Mindanao having won the championship in past Mindanao Parliamentary Debate tournaments (it was called something else then), invited me and some other classmates- Jeffrey Blanza, Carl Rubio and Austine Lim- to try out. Because there were too few people who actually showed up (meaning just the four of us), a "try-out" didn't happen and we were told we would be representing the Accountancy Department. The debate format was American Parliamentary and I got paired with Carl. It was a good pairing, Carl's specialty was politics, mine was economy. We reached the semis but lost to a high school team. Okay, let me explain. These high schoolers were more experienced than us. They've already been to real competitive tournaments before, debating against college students from all over Mindanao. Experience is a major factor in winning debates and these kids were fast learners, I admired them a big deal. Jeffrey and Austine took home the bacon, though.

In that semester, the Ateneo debate varsity invited me to join the club. I said yes, and when the veterans like Mark dela Cruz, Richard Labitag and Aying Clarito did a sort of showdown, I was intimidated a great deal and I wondered if my puny little self could handle something like that. Competitive debating is a lot about intimidation and well, vanity. I was really more into being a laid back writer since I did a lot of campus journalism back in high school. They convinced me otherwise and in that year, I joined my first inter-school tournament, the 3rd Mindanao Parlimentary Debate Championships in Butuan City. I, Austine and Jeffrey composed Team B, and we broke to the quarterfinals. That tournament was a turning point; it was then that I realized I really loved competitive debating. A lot. The pressure gave me diarrhea lots of times, but it was worth it. In that summer, our trio joined the 8th All-Asians Parliamentary Championships wherein I was ranked 53rd in Asia at the end of the tournament. Yes, I remember that fondly. Haha! Insignificant as it may sound, I was quite proud of myself in that tournament because we won 3 of our 7 matches, and one was against our coach team composed of Aying, Richard and high school debate wonder Sharmila Parmanand. Sharms is now with the Ateneo Debate Society of ADMU winning the Nationals, Asians and making it to the Worlds semifinals. Way to go, Sharms!

The following year I joined my second Mindanao tournament which was held in Zamboanga City, and I was paired with Jenilee Awichen, who would become my constant debate "fartner" in other tournaments. We would also become really good friends. Our combination was fiery, and we made it to the Finals this time. We ranked a good second, losing to one team from Ateneo de Davao in the finals adjudicated by Joan de Venecia.

In my senior year, the pressure of the looming CPA Board exams won over the pressure of debating the counter-productiveness of fundamentalism for Islam so I decided to "keep a low profile" to focus on balancing my worksheets. That didn't go well with the debate varsity moderator Magdy and some fellows in the club, which created a sort of rift between us. I miss Magdy. Since I graduated and Magdy left for Bahrain, we haven't been in touch. In the next competitions, I managed to break but, well, didn't quite bring home the bacon. Tough.

Now, 3 years after I graduated from college, I'm back to the debate world thanks to my good friend Ruth! This time, however, I don't debate anymore- I adjudicate and help Ruth and Alih (a fellow Zamboangeno) coach budding debaters from Philippine Normal University. They're very new to competitive debate and have a long way to go, but you see potential when it stares right back at you. Ruth and I are both doing this without any financial gain, but the intangible return is really what matters. I get to practice being analytical and critical once more, and I get to mold some young minds to some degree. I love being able to teach the kids a thing or two.

Competitive debating is really more than just a speech contest. It's about being in the know about relevant issues that affect everyone- from the marginalized cluster of people in Sudan to the Secretary-General of the United Nations. It's about being skilled to think for one's self and possibly contribute to a well-informed society where the youth participate in public discourse of relevent issues. A really good debater from ADMU, Oliver Segovia, wrote an essay about the power of debate education and how it helps shape a democratic political culture among the (Filipino) youth. The essay won the World Bank International Essay Competition.

He writes:

I have always been opinionated, even as a child. I remember having my first debate in 7th grade speech class. Our debate was about the use of contraceptives for population control. At a time when my personal opinion favored the use contraceptives, I was asked to defend the opposite side. This was a critical part of my development as an individual. I had to take a position I did not personally believe in and defend myself in front of the whole class. I was first averse to the idea, but it broadened my thinking by leaps and bounds. By defending the other side, I was obligated to understand the opposing view. For the first time, I was considering two points of view, instead of just mine. I was seeking to understand, before seeking to be understood. The ability to think, to understand and to argue on both sides of two opposing ideas is a powerful tool. It enabled me think better about the choices I made in my academic, personal and professional life.

So totally agree.

Retrospect

I miss my neurotic pals from Terror City, especially Kat who works in Coca Cola, and Lois (pronounced loins without N, not like Superman’s bimbo love interest. Come on, you have to be really stupid to be fooled by pomade and some dorky eyeglasses). Lois is also called Toto slash Black Mamba.

There is a remarkable story to the origin of Eloisa’s nickname "Toto." When her mother was carrying Toto in her womb, an ultrasound test revealed a boy. The family decided on the "boy’s" nickname but were in for a surprise when instead a bouncing baby girl emerged from her mother’s uterus a couple of months after. By then, the family had already become attached to the masculine nickname they did not bother to re-nickname the baby. Since then, Eloisa answers to Toto. As for the origin of the Black Mamba alias, you can go ask her personally because i do not know.

Toto is the life of any group and is funnier than Conan O’brien meets Jim Carey meets Ogie Diaz. She is my local version of Lisa Kudrow, who was awesome in Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion. She’s my favorite Friends cast too. Anyway, like me, Toto was a high school Valedictorian at Claret High School and appreciated a crazy in-your-face fit of laughter much more than memorizing mathematical formulae. When i moved to the Central Business District for my so-called career though, i underwent a phasing. I am no longer as crazy and funny as I used to be. I miss myself. But that’s entirely another story.

Here’s Toto before her sex change operation (hehehe…)


And here she is, four years after surgery…

Amazing.


***



I miss Mindpro too. It’s this small down-to-earth mall along La Purisima Street in Terror City. It’s the IN place back home, with its share of bums hanging out and some occasional bombings here and there. Hehe, kidding. Maybe not. Well there are occasional threats. I also miss satti. It’s this spicy red broth with compressed rice and little bits of beef barbecue on a stick. I got hooked to it in college when my classmates introduced me to this wonderful Southern creation. I can’t find it in Manila. I miss AIDS. AIDS as in Ateneo Intrepid Debate Society. It’s a small but popular student organization in Ateneo de Zamboanga that represented the university in debate tournaments.

I found great people of the same wave length in AIDS, people who were as neurotic as me. We liked to shove arguments down each others’ throats and discuss political, economic and social issues at the sidelines. I tried campus journalism, myself being chief editor way back in high school, but I was drawn to debating. The thrill of waiting for the motion, anticipating the government’s case when I’m in the opposition, prepping in as little as 15 minutes, and dropping some points of information now and then are incomparable. I loved it. And it was so cool when I found people who were as into debating as I was. We weren’t the best in the country, but we did make our mark by being the best in the region. AIDS has won the Mindanao cup too, several times. I got introduced to debating in my sophomore year when I represented the Accountancy team for the Debate Fiesta in Ateneo. Then I competed in my first real tournament in the Mindanao Parliamentary Debate Championship in Butuan City. My team made it to the quarterfinals. In that summer I debated in the Asians Parliamentary Championship, an annual event participated in by I think 7 Asian countries. I (think I) didn’t do bad, considering it was only my second real tournament and I beat my coaches (Richard, Aying and Sharmila, who's now world class) in one round.

The experiences in the Mindanao tourneys and the Nationals were always memorable and funny. Being true viciador ZamboangeƱos, we were always gagging in laughter in our hotel rooms after competitions. Sometimes I wish I was back in college.